Acceptance

When I started on the road to losing a toddler I was in a pretty bad place mentally. I knew that where I was wasn't healthy and that my mothers "loving" comments about my new body additions were only going to get worse if I didn't do anything.

I would like to continue to lie to myself to say that I've always been accepting of my body and the way I look but that isn't helping me or you. For a long time, I was accepting of my "big bones" and the extra fat they carried. And why shouldn't I be? My family has always accepted it, my friends accepted it, my love interests accepted it and society did to.

That acceptance is what got me here and has me fighting to get back away from it. Now by no means do I think I will ever (in a crack free manner) get down to a size 6 and I have no desire to be that small. But over the course of time in becoming happy with me and accepting who I am, I've determined that there are some things that I refuse to accept from anyone anymore including:

1. I will not accept that being 5inches taller than the people in my immediate circle makes it okay for me to be obese

2. I will not accept that because I have a "coke bottle" shape that it is okay to be obese

3. I will not accept that thick does not equal fat... it does. That is conditioning that makes you think otherwise

4. I will not accept that I have to have a certain body size to be loved.

5. I will not accept that just because I don't have any diseases traditionally associated with obesity that I shouldn't be worried about my weight

6. I will not accept the mind games that clothing manufactures try to play with my self esteem and that little number on the tag

7. I will not accept anyone not accepting me because I'm not "modelesque" when I'm in the list of healthy and active

and so much more...

I'm only willing to accept that I love me for me.

I am going to keep working towards being the healthist me that I can be.